Heavy Shoulders

So many things has happened this year...till this point of writing nothing but memories left behind, past un-rewindable... Going through the motions... feels like I'm quite lost? Getting tired of the burdens on the shoulders though... how long can i last? I dont need to have a silver / golden spoon in my mouth, i just want to be able to live my life... not having to worry for everyone... Putting that maturity that I wasnt even ready to take on... Some days I wish I was alot more selfish, to just let go off everything... but I could be able to live my self in that guilt... Conscience still in place after all... All these mess is giving a headache too...arghhh