Apologies

I know this makes no difference since whatever happened has already past & time cannot be reverted. But I am really sorry for what I did...there was 2 different thoughts going on my mind when it happened.

I ve gotta admit that I am indeed guilty without any doubt. I guess the crack of selfish trait has shown its tail - I worry if it would get worse...

I shouldn't have raised my voice... i should have control my anger...

My concerns did in fact trouble me & I just didnt realize how obvoius it was reflected on my face. That sour / moody face & blady expression of disgust...

I m really sorry... knowing that right now lots of thinking is going on, on both sides... 

I feel helpless - i abhor that feeling so much... the feeling of not being able to control...

But that's just what it is... I cannot control the outcome & i am lost of how to settle this issue as of now... perhaps & perhaps only time will reveal the future...

Not good in expression sorrow in words... wont do much relieve either...

...(dot dot dot ... )

Update - 1 paper 2 go, Slight Intro2new Blog...

Huray !!! 3 papers down...

1 more additional paper more next week - which also spells the END of Sem 3... Seems been awhile since i have been attending classes but still Sem 3 only...

Been writing so lengthy answer but thats because i've got nothing in my brain... just got to pen something down instead of leaving it blank... cant afford to fail...

And so I planned many things, and many more to come... as like before i also plan + wishful thinking = zero achieved *guilty smile*

And lets see, i would come out if a list of "Things to do" if i wasn't so disorganized, in additional to being a procastinator + day dreaming overly too much.... busy..... (bla bla bla...)

Do hope to launch the new blog that i wanted at least before my b.dae... at least a place where i can pour out freely... this blog is more like a "Mama's Boy - kind of blog" should there be a comparison with the blog i m planning to launch... Gonna voice out grudges, disastisfaction + bang others + release tension... and remain Anonymous for the most part of it...

Just the thought of it also SYOK... but will take time to try to put everything together..

Hmmm... got more to say but i ll leave it for next time... 

*P/S - This blog is becoming more like my personal diary...

Till then, got a feeling that i ll be back soon... Cheers & Good Nite Ppl !

Exam mau mali - Damn stress !!

Will be starting a new blog by next month =p

Kind of liking the idea of it - i like it anyway...

Tuesday would sem 3 exam for me... but haven even started studying much as off now. Still got 1 more hours.. or perhaps i count down by the hours? i guess this fact testify or confirms that i'm a 'last minute' person.

But tension & pressure + stress is definately mounting - hate exams !! But really cant wait till exam finishes - its like a new fresh page, a new sem... so much planned forth.... 

However, somehow these days not feeling so at ease as I should be...its like the sort of feeling of "Dejawu"... knowing something bad might happen... or perhaps that just anxieties ... Going on study leave tmr... thankfully... but the shitty part is I am still worried about my work... hard to explain over here... I guess I have to somehow push that thought aside for the moment & let what comes - comes...

Actually trying to re-discover the feeling that i once had... the determination ... miss that feeling... that is why m planning to start that new blog... to pump up & hopefully that feeling does come back to me... 

I'll be back... wish me luck for exam !!

Random

Suppose to be a week to get my mind filled with study material but i would say that I m rather moodless to do so... 

Tired of the usual routine of things...Studies, work...

I missing so many things - 1 of it ... blogging... 

Neways... wish me the best for my exam next week

Born Rich?!

Just kind of random feeling - football match nite.. syok but tired...

Hang out for short supper at the so called high class area - Mount Kiara.

Grand houses, expensive cars.... life best offerings?!

I guess i m envious... diu...even thou i shouldn't be ... but what to do... OKOK...

Maybe not everybody there were born in a rich family.. perhaps they managed to grab hold of supervb opportunity that came their way? or perhaps they worked their way up to what they are now?

Cant complaint so much de la... since being born in rich family not an option... left with the other shit choice lor.. what to do...

Monday blues again tmr.... sigh... work....

Nitez ppl !

Busy-ing Apr....

Hi ~~

It's been a while... my fren say its been more than 5 weeks that since i last updated blog..

Busying - usual work, studies this sem pretty heavy too...

"Busy - just a phrase u use when u have poor time managment ... ! " - Quotes my Boss..

Sigh.. i guess i just suck at that... able to improve this area this yr? Hopefully so... suppose to be 1 of my 2009 resolution..

Damn - i hate that i procastinate so much !

Btw, hitting target last 2 months was SWEET :) ; Gotta save up thou, sales is like a roller coster anyway... got high got low.. now steady decline...

Orite folks.... will next update after my exam... c ya in 1 month time.

Today I feel...

Today i feel so random...

Today i feel & perhaps realize that I am meant to be the under-dog - naturally born to be...

Today i feel that I don't feel comfortable when things too smoothly...

Today i feel i like & hate challenges...

Today i feel i inherited the blood of a 'fighter'...

Today i feel i nothing much - feels kind of meaningness - i think...

Today i feel tired as usual...

Today.... Tonite.... I sleep & wake up......

Today..... Routine.....